Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Back again

So where am I now??
Well I am sitting here in a not very nice place in a not very nice town in good old Mother England.

My little one is asleep... finally, my hubby is at work and I am left here in silence (if you don't count the noise from the busy road outside) to contemplate my thoughts...

Here is where they are at the moment...
I am in a little shock right now, just yesterday I was on top of the world. We had found our little piece of paradise or so we thought and were all set to move in on the weekend coming.

I was also pregnant again and happy to be so! And I tell you at 41 this is quite something!!!

Today, there are problems with the house and moving in AND when I went to pee this morning, there was that sight that all pregnant women (especially my age) dread to see.... The spot!

Well the spot has turned into a flow...
AND the real estate agent is not bending for us and so I have all but given up hope of getting out of this not very nice house in a not very nice town this weekend!

I have not however, given up hope that this "flow" stops and that I am still pregnant at the end of this day...
Will keep you posted on that one!

But how amazing, one minute all looks rosy and wonderful and it seems like all is going your way... You walk around with your head high and shoulders back and you feel like you are just glowing. Then suddenly almost from one minute to the next, you are grovelling on the floor, howling like a wolf at the full moon and wondering what you could have possibly done to deserve all this!

Impermanence!

7 comments:

  1. oh hun, i'm so sorry. but like you say, it doesn't have to mean the worst. especially at our age, our bodies are trickier and perhaps it's just doing odd things.

    and sorry about the move. that can be a very stressful thing, let alone when it's halted in it's tracks.

    but when/why did you leave Germany?

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  2. Hey Mon, we left Germany in March and headed for the Canary Islands for a few weeks... Just didn't work out in Berlin so we headed for the sun... whilst there my hubby got a contract in the UK and so here we are!

    I see you are on the move too... Great news!

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  3. Glad to see something from you in my reader today, was just wondering where you were and if you would blog again. Blogging is itself often a lesson in impermanence, as people go in and out a lot! I was going to ask about the move from Germany to England, but you answered that to Mon.

    I am sorry to hear about all the problems. I did bleed in the first trimester in both my pregnancies - in fact, that is how I discovered I was having twins so early in my second, because I started bleeding at 8 weeks and so had an ultrasound. In my case, all was OK both times. But of course you don't know yet, nature has its own code. I hope for the best for you all, sending you blessings...

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  4. I hope everything is okay with the pregnancy! Happy to see you, wish it was a better day for you...

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  5. Hope the spot isn't anything sinister. I had that too, then turned into severe cramping and flow thought the worst, but all ok! And I was 28 then.
    Will hold the congratulations but I hope it works out for you.

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  6. Good to hear from you and we're in the same country now! Sincerely hope things do work out for the best. Keep us posted.

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  7. Thanks everyone, as it turns out, I did lose the little one :(
    Not meant to be I guess... still not sure how I am feeling about it all, maybe I should write about it!!!
    Big hugs to you all for your lovely support

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